we need to talk about that house loan
Here are some phone pics of my sleeping arrangement for the past few days (living outdoors is the best)
This is good
this is groot?
Please don’t ever try to learn how to rub a clit from porn.
I repeat, please don’t EVER try to learn how to rub a clit from porn.
porn clit rubbing looks like they’re trying to scrub burnt food off a frying pan
(EXTREMELY OBNOXIOUSLY LOUD YELLING) WHEN YOU WALK AWAY. YOU DON’T HEAR ME SAY PUH LEEAAAAAAAASE (EXTENDS HAND) OH BAAAABYYYY. DON’T GO (BRINGS HAND TO CHEST) SIMPLE AND CLEAN (TOUCHES SELF) IS THE WAY THAT YOU’RE MAKIN ME FEEEEEEL TONIGHT (MAKES FIST IN FRONTA FACE THEN PULLS DOWNWARD) IT’S HAAAARD TO LET IT GO (DRAMATICALLY SHEDS TEAR)
If a white boy is talking to you just say “oh shit dude no way” and they’ll think you’re listening the whole time
IF HER BRA MATCHES HER PANTIES THEN CONGRATS YOU’RE GETTING LAID
just in case you haven’t figured it out by the time she’s down to her fucking underwear you inbred
I can’t even hear what this dude’s saying but look at how ineffectually angry this bird is.
I adore barn owls
Here is a man who loves his job, and an owl who just doesn’t appreciate him. Not one little bit.